Asian family conflicts

by Naz
(UK)

I have a problem with on going family conflicts. Basically, my situation is that my childhood has been very difficult, my parents both have mental health illnesses. When I was 6 my mum had to leave because of her illness. So my, my older sister and older brother were young cargivers. None of my relatives helped us, neither were we supported by social services. My brother was only 15. Since then we have struggled to survive. But we did well all three of us went to university.

Since my school days my cousin has been in the same year as me and we use to hang out but she bullied me. She was really nasty. We were close once, but as we grew up we got distant and I didnt like how she treated me. I decided to go my own way and went to a really good college and I just couldn't be around her. She is such an aggressive person, hot headed, only looking for a fight. She would just shout at me and was really horrible, then walk away leaving me feeling awful, when I had done nothing wrong. then suddenly she would start talking to me, after the cold shoulder for days, then she would never apologise or discuss why she spoke to me the way she did. I was a kid when this happened, as I grew up, my confidence was never intact to speak up to her (because of my own family problems), like she would listen anyway. So I kept my distance, but its happenening again but much worse. I am not sure what I should do to stop the conflict.

Her family has never been supportive and caused nothing but problems. He sister abused me, and I had to call the police because her parents did not stop her from abusing me. I asked to speak to her but she doesnt want to know. I am actually scared to confront her but I am fed up of being treated this way. They seem to treat us like family when it suits them but when we really need help, we get nothing. I am frustrated at the bullying, how do I make it stop? I keep getting targeted even when I am not the person who has caused a problem.