Chapter 5 – Solving the Apparently Insoluble Problem

Understanding anxiety, rumination, sensitization, acceptance, and finding a new point of view.

There are times when a problem in our lives can become so tangled with worry, fear, guilt, or sadness that it begins to feel impossible to solve. Claire Weekes recognized that the original problem is not always the only thing keeping us stuck. Sometimes our constant thinking about the problem, our fear of how we feel, and our attempts to find certainty can create a second problem that is even harder to escape.

When a Problem Begins to Feel Impossible to Solve

Some problems really are difficult. But sometimes the feeling that a problem is impossible comes partly from the way we have become trapped in thinking about it. When the same question is examined again and again without reaching a useful answer, our thinking can become another source of stress.

Perhaps you keep asking yourself what you should have done differently. Maybe you replay a conversation, worry about what someone thinks of you, check how you feel, or imagine what might happen next. You think about it in the morning, during the day, and again when you go to bed.

Weekes called this kind of repeated anxious thinking "brooding." Today, psychologists often use the word rumination or repetitive negative thinking to describe similar patterns of repeatedly going over upsetting thoughts, worries, memories, or problems.

Research has found important relationships between repetitive negative thinking and anxiety and depression. This does not mean that thinking about a problem causes every anxiety disorder, but it does suggest that getting stuck in repetitive worry and rumination can become part of the cycle that keeps emotional distress going.

Read the PubMed research on worry, rumination, and repetitive negative thinking →

How the Problem Can Begin to Make Us Ill

Weekes describes a cycle in which continued worry and emotional tension can make a person increasingly sensitive to stress. The important idea is that a person may begin reacting strongly not only to major problems, but also to much smaller stresses and sensations.

Imagine carrying a heavy backpack. At first you may be able to carry it without much trouble. But if you carry it all day, every day, even adding one small book may eventually feel like too much.

Weekes used the idea of sensitization to describe something similar. In her framework, prolonged fear and tension can leave the nervous system highly reactive. Modern research also uses the term stress sensitization to describe changes in how previous stress exposure can influence later responses to stress.

This does not mean that your nervous system has been permanently damaged. It means that a system repeatedly exposed to stress may respond differently when another stressor appears.

Researchers have studied stress sensitization in relation to physiological, behavioral, and emotional responses to later stress. Read the PubMed review on stress-induced sensitization →

Another review has examined the idea of sensitization to internal and external stimuli, including changes in physiological, cognitive, behavioral, and emotional responses. Read the PubMed review on brain sensitization to internal and external stimuli →

What Does It Mean When Anxiety Becomes More "Acute"?

The word acute simply means very strong, intense, or severe. When Weekes talks about anxiety becoming more acute, she is describing anxiety that feels stronger, more noticeable, and harder to ignore.

For someone with a sensitized stress response, a small worry may suddenly feel enormous. A normal physical sensation may seem frightening. A little criticism may produce a surprisingly strong emotional reaction. A tired feeling may feel like complete exhaustion.

This can be confusing because the person may think, "Why am I reacting this way? This isn't like me." The reaction itself then becomes another reason to worry.

You may become frightened because you are frightened. You may become upset because you are upset. You may begin checking yourself to see whether you are getting better, which can keep your attention focused even more closely on every sensation and emotion.

When Feelings Become Bigger Than They Used To Be

Sensitization, as Weekes described it, is not only about physical anxiety symptoms. A person may also notice that ordinary emotions seem much stronger than they once did. Sadness, anger, frustration, fear, embarrassment, or guilt may all feel unusually intense.

You may cry more easily, become irritated by small things, feel overwhelmed by ordinary decisions, or become frightened by emotions that would not have bothered you before.

This can create another layer of fear. Instead of simply feeling an emotion, you begin watching yourself having the emotion.

You may find yourself asking:

• Why am I feeling this way?
• Why can't I control this?
• Why am I so emotional?
• When will I feel normal again?
• What if I never get better?

The mind can then become trapped in a constant search for an explanation.

The Exhausted Mind Can Get Stuck on One Theme

When someone has been under prolonged stress, they may notice that their mind keeps returning to the same subject. It can feel as though the brain has lost its ability to move naturally from one thought to another.

Before becoming highly anxious or exhausted, a person might have a sad thought and then move on. They might worry about something and then become interested in something else. But when someone becomes highly focused on their symptoms, fears, and emotions, thoughts can begin to feel "sticky."

The same question comes back. The same memory comes back. The same fear comes back. The same physical sensation gets checked again.

You may eventually think:

"I think about this all day. I cannot seem to make my brain stop."

This does not necessarily mean that you have lost control of your mind. Repetitive thinking can itself consume attention and mental resources, making it harder to shift your attention away from distressing thoughts.

Modern research has examined the relationship between repetitive negative thinking, self-control, and executive functioning — the mental skills we use for attention, planning, and shifting our focus. Read the research on repetitive negative thinking and executive functioning →

When Thinking Becomes Another Source of Stress

There is nothing wrong with thinking about a problem. Thinking can help us make decisions, solve problems, learn from mistakes, and plan what to do next. The difficulty begins when thinking stops moving toward a useful answer and becomes repetitive.

Consider the difference between helpful thinking and brooding or rumination.

Helpful Thinking

Helpful thinking moves toward something useful:

"I made a mistake. What can I learn from it, and what can I do differently next time?"

Brooding or Rumination

Brooding goes over the same ground again and again without bringing you closer to an answer:

"Why did I do that? Why didn't I know better? What if everyone thinks I'm terrible? What if I never forgive myself? Why can't I stop thinking about this?"

The first kind of thinking moves toward an action or answer. The second keeps reopening the same emotional wound.

This distinction is important because people who ruminate may believe they are solving the problem. They may think that if they keep thinking long enough, they will finally find the answer.

But sometimes the mind is not solving the problem. It is simply going around the same circle.

Research has identified repetitive negative thinking as an important process across anxiety and depressive disorders. Studies have also examined treatments that specifically target rumination, worry, and other forms of repetitive negative thinking. Read the systematic review of treatments targeting rumination and worry→

The Apparently Insoluble Problem

The word "apparently" is important. Weekes was not saying that every difficult problem has a simple answer. Some problems truly are painful, complicated, or outside our control. Instead, she was asking us to consider whether our view of the problem has become so narrow that we can no longer see any way forward.

Some things cannot be changed. We cannot undo the past. We cannot force another person to forgive us. We cannot control what someone else thinks. We cannot guarantee that nothing bad will ever happen.

But there may still be another kind of solution.

We may not be able to change the facts, but we may eventually be able to change how we carry those facts.

Sometimes recovery begins when we stop demanding that the past become different before we allow ourselves to move forward.

Sorrow, Guilt, Shame, and Regret

Weekes understood that painful emotions can become especially powerful when they are repeatedly examined through an anxious mind. Sorrow, guilt, shame, and regret can each become subjects that the mind returns to again and again.

You may find yourself thinking:

• Sorrow: "I will never be happy again."
• Guilt: "I should have done something differently."
• Shame: "There is something wrong with me."
• Regret: "If only I could go back."

These thoughts can feel completely true when you are exhausted and distressed. But a powerful feeling is not always a complete description of reality.

Sadness can make the future look hopeless. Fear can make danger seem closer. Guilt can make one mistake seem unforgivable. Shame can make one part of our life feel as though it defines our entire identity.

This is one reason a new point of view can be so important.

Understanding Before Trying to Change

One of the strongest ideas in Weekes' approach is that understanding can reduce fear. When we understand why a sensation or emotion may be happening, we may become less frightened by the sensation itself.

Imagine that you suddenly feel dizzy. If you believe dizziness means you are about to collapse, fear may quickly increase. You become tense, notice your heartbeat, pay closer attention to your breathing, and begin watching the dizziness.

But if you understand that anxiety and stress can sometimes contribute to physical sensations, the same sensation may not automatically seem as threatening.

Understanding does not mean assuming that every symptom is caused by anxiety. New, severe, persistent, or concerning physical symptoms should always be discussed with an appropriate healthcare professional.

What understanding can do is help you stop automatically adding fear to every uncomfortable sensation.

Acceptance Does Not Mean Giving Up

Acceptance is another word that can easily be misunderstood. Acceptance does not mean that you like what is happening, that you want it to continue, or that you have given up hope of feeling better.

Acceptance means allowing the present moment to be what it is without adding another fight to it.

For example:

"I feel anxious right now."

Instead of:

"I feel anxious, and this must mean something is terribly wrong."

Or:

"My mind is stuck on this thought again."

Instead of:

"Why can't I control my mind? Something must be terribly wrong with me."

The first statements describe what is happening. The second statements add fear, judgment, and interpretation.

Acceptance gives you the opportunity to experience an uncomfortable moment without turning it into a second emergency.

Giving Yourself Some Grace

People who have lived with anxiety for a long time can become extremely hard on themselves. They may believe they should have recovered already or that they should be able to control their thoughts and emotions.

But recovery is difficult when you are constantly criticizing yourself for struggling.

You may hear your mind say:

• "I should be better by now."
• "Other people can handle this. Why can't I?"
• "I should be able to control my thoughts."
• "I am wasting my life."
• "I am weak."

Try answering yourself more gently:

"I am having a difficult time, and I am learning how to handle it differently."

This is not making excuses. It is removing unnecessary pressure.

You cannot frighten yourself into feeling safe. You cannot bully yourself into becoming calm. Sometimes the first step toward recovery is giving yourself permission to stop fighting yourself.

Finding a New Point of View

Weekes believed that changing the way we look at our experience is an important part of breaking old patterns. Sometimes, however, we are simply too close to the problem to see it clearly.

Imagine holding a photograph one inch from your face. You can see every tiny detail, but you cannot see the whole picture. Moving the photograph farther away does not change the picture. It changes your view of it.

The same thing can happen with anxiety and difficult life problems.

If you cannot find another perspective by yourself, it can be helpful to speak with someone you trust. This might be a therapist, counselor, physician, trusted friend, family member, spiritual leader, or support group.

An outside person can sometimes help us notice assumptions and possibilities that are difficult to see when we are frightened or emotionally exhausted.

Asking for another perspective is not failure. Sometimes another person's viewpoint is exactly what helps us see the door that we could not see from where we were standing.

What Claire Weekes Called "Glimpsing"

"Glimpsing" is one of the more interesting ideas associated with Weekes' approach. The word may sound complicated, but the basic idea is simple: you briefly catch another way of looking at your situation.

You do not have to believe the new point of view all day. You may only see it for a few seconds.

That still matters.

For example, imagine someone who constantly worries about having a serious illness. They notice a physical sensation, check themselves, search for information, or ask someone for reassurance. The reassurance helps for a short time, but the doubt eventually returns.

A glimpse might be:

"I am noticing this sensation, but noticing it does not automatically mean something terrible is happening."

Or:

"I have been checking because I am afraid. Perhaps the checking itself is keeping my attention locked onto the fear."

The goal is not to prove that everything is fine. The goal is to become willing to consider that your first fearful interpretation may not be the only possible explanation.

Glimpsing Is Not Positive Thinking

This distinction is important because people with anxiety are often told to "think positive." That advice can feel impossible when you are genuinely frightened or distressed. Weekes' idea of glimpsing is more realistic.

You are not required to tell yourself that everything is wonderful. You are simply allowing another possibility to exist.

The First Picture

"I feel dizzy. Something must be wrong."

The Second Picture

"I am noticing dizziness. There can be many reasons for a physical sensation, and anxiety can sometimes contribute to physical symptoms. I can respond calmly while still paying appropriate attention to my health."

The First Picture

"I cannot concentrate. My brain is failing."

The Second Picture

"My mind has been under a great deal of stress. Fatigue and repetitive worrying can make concentration harder. I do not have to panic about every temporary lapse in concentration."

The First Picture

"I am having a strong emotional reaction. I must be losing control."

The Second Picture

"My emotions are very strong right now. Strong does not automatically mean dangerous."

The First Picture

"I have thought about this problem all day, so I must keep thinking until I solve it."

The Second Picture

"Perhaps thinking about it continuously is part of what is keeping me exhausted. I can give my mind a break."

You are not trying to win an argument with your anxious mind. You are simply opening the door to another possibility.

Practice Looking for the Second Picture

One simple way to practice Weekes' idea of glimpsing is to notice the first frightening interpretation and then deliberately look for a second, more balanced possibility. The second picture does not have to be positive. It simply needs to be more open and less controlled by fear.

What Can You Do When Your Mind Keeps Going Back?

Knowing about rumination is useful, but knowing what to do when you notice yourself caught in it is even more useful. The goal is not to force your mind to stop producing thoughts. Instead, you can practice changing what you do when the thought appears.

1. Notice It

Say to yourself: "I'm thinking about this again."

There is no need to criticize yourself for it.

2. Name the Pattern

You might say: "This is the same worry loop."

Or: "I am trying to solve the same question again."

3. Ask Whether the Thinking Is Useful

Ask yourself:

"Is there something practical I can do about this right now?"

If there is, take the practical step. If there is not, continuing to think about the same question may not give you a different answer.

4. Find Your Glimpse

Ask:

"Is there another way to look at this?"

You only need a small opening.

5. Return to the Present

Do something ordinary. Wash the dishes. Take a walk. Make lunch. Read a few pages. Sit outside. Call someone. Work on a project. Fold the laundry. Take care of something that needs doing.

You are giving your attention another place to go.

6. Let the Thought Return Without Starting the Argument Again

The thought may come back. That does not mean you failed.

You can simply say:

"There is that thought again."

Then gently return to what you were doing.

What If You Cannot Find a Solution?

Sometimes the most helpful question is not "How do I solve this?" but "How can I live while this is not completely solved?" This does not mean giving up. It means refusing to put your entire life on hold until every question has an answer.

Maybe the relationship cannot be repaired today.

Maybe you cannot change what happened in the past.

Maybe you cannot know what your health will look like next year.

Maybe you cannot make someone forgive you.

Maybe you cannot guarantee that nothing bad will ever happen.

But you can still take today's walk.

You can still eat lunch.

You can still talk with someone you love.

You can still laugh at something.

You can still work toward something meaningful.

You can still rest.

An unsolved problem does not have to become an unlived life.

The Goal Is Not to Think Your Way Back to Health

Understanding is important, but recovery cannot happen entirely inside your head. At some point, the new understanding has to become part of everyday life. You begin by doing what you can, even if you do not yet feel completely confident.

A short walk counts.

A conversation counts.

A household task counts.

A trip to the store counts.

Sitting outside counts.

Doing something you once enjoyed counts.

You do not have to wait until you feel completely calm before you begin living again.

The goal is not to force your nervous system to become calm. It is to stop treating every uncomfortable sensation, thought, or emotion as an emergency.

A Gentler Way to Look at Recovery

If you have struggled for months or years, you may have become frightened by how long the struggle has lasted. You may think that if you were going to get better, you would have been better already. But the length of time you have struggled is not proof that you cannot change.

A pattern that has been repeated many times can become very familiar. But research suggests that repetitive negative thinking can also be reduced through psychological treatment, and reductions in repetitive negative thinking can occur alongside improvements in depression and anxiety.

Read the meta-analysis on psychological treatment and repetitive negative thinking →

Weekes approached recovery through her own framework of sensitization, fear, acceptance, and gradual desensitization. Modern research does not simply prove every part of that framework, but several of the underlying ideas — including the effects of repetitive negative thinking and the way stress can influence later responses — continue to be studied.

Her larger message remains useful: you can gradually learn to respond differently.

You can notice without constantly checking.

You can feel without immediately fearing the feeling.

You can think without endlessly analyzing.

You can have an uncomfortable emotion without deciding that it means something is terribly wrong.

You can have a problem without allowing the problem to consume every part of your life.

And sometimes recovery begins with something very small:

A glimpse.

A moment when you see things just a little differently.

Then another moment.

Then another.

You do not have to hold onto the new point of view perfectly. You only have to keep returning to it.

Understanding "Reprogramming" the Nervous System

People sometimes describe anxiety recovery as "reprogramming" the brain. This can be a helpful metaphor, but it is not meant literally. A more accurate way to think about it is learning, practice, and changing familiar patterns of response.

The brain and nervous system are capable of adapting based on experience. When fear, checking, avoidance, and constant self-monitoring are repeated again and again, those responses can become very familiar.

But calmer responses, acceptance, returning attention to the present, and gradually doing things that fear tells you to avoid can also be practiced.

The aim is not to force your nervous system to become calm.

The aim is to stop feeding the alarm with constant fear, checking, and struggle.

That takes time.

And that is one reason Weekes emphasized patience rather than constantly measuring whether recovery was happening fast enough.

Life Is Bigger Than the Problem

Perhaps this is the heart of what Weekes was trying to show in this chapter. Sometimes the way forward does not appear because we have finally solved every difficult thing in our lives. It appears because we stop demanding that every difficult thing be solved before we allow ourselves to live.

Understanding can reduce fear. Acceptance can reduce the struggle. A different point of view can open possibilities that anxiety had hidden from us.

And small moments of living, repeated over time, can begin to teach us something that fear may have made us forget:

Life is bigger than the problem.

You are more than the thoughts you are having.

And today's feelings do not have to become tomorrow's future.

Research and Further Reading

Claire Weekes developed her approach decades ago, so it is useful to distinguish her terminology from modern scientific language. The following research does not prove every part of Weekes' approach, but it provides modern context for several subjects discussed on this page, including repetitive negative thinking, rumination, anxiety, depression, stress sensitization, and cognitive resources.

• The relationship between worry, rumination, and comorbidity: evidence for repetitive negative thinking as a transdiagnostic construct
• Assessing treatments used to reduce rumination and/or worry: a systematic review
• The effects of cognitive-behavior therapy for depression on repetitive negative thinking: a meta-analysis
• Repetitive negative thinking predicts depression and anxiety symptom improvement during brief cognitive behavioral therapy
• Perseverative Negative Thinking, Self-Control, and Executive Functioning in Symptoms of Depression and Anxiety
• Stress-induced sensitization: the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis and beyond
• Brain sensitization to external and internal stimuli